Fat Man – Eshan Kapoor

I don’t lament because of what I saw in that dimness,
it is your lie, your coldness that really puts me into distress.

Do you think I was kidding??No, I wasn’t joking.
But then, why the fat man got what he wanted while I just kept looking for my sins?
Why this prejudice? Whenever I think about you I take every breath blasphemously.
My pen leaves its sluggishness, rises from its sleep, it gets mired in these words, and it just weeps.
It seems that everything I said has now backfired on me.

It’s your idiocy that you can’t see the fat man’s larceny.
I still remember the day when he turned around, showing his teeth;
to understand this absurdity, was my only need.
Why do you think I am frivolous?
Aren’t my words getting more and more imperative?
It was his cabal that destroyed the whole shebang.
Now there is a weak cry even in my laughter,
the only choice I have, is to look down,
but without a frown, would have been probably better.

This is not my effrontery; I am not being cynical,
But my WORDS are certainly lyrical.
Fat man, do you think I am going barmy,
No brother, I am not being canny.
You will really come to know what I am talking about
if you once just turn your back,
you will realize how people make fun of you,
the only thing is that they just don’t yak
It really doesn’t matter anymore; what you do is none of my business
but when I really think about it shatters me into pieces.

Don’t consider this as my submission,
Don’t even think for a second that I am an underdog,
Brother, you have no idea how much this has made me strong.
There are certain lines which I can’t cross,
Things about which I certainly can’t talk.
Now, my people ask what’s wrong with me……
Tell me fat man, how am I supposed to explain all this?
All I say is that I have seen a few things which I really shouldn’t have seen.

Dear you are happy, that’s what I all always wanted you to be,
But certainly this is not the way I had expected it to be.
Fat man, you have ruined it all now…..
Believe me, if my words were a gun, I wouldn’t need bullets to kill you
Because I know that you would die just by the burden of their profound truth.
How am I supposed to forgive you for this infraction of yours??
It’s not my proclivity to say all this dolefully.
How will I tell you what’s wrong, what’s going inside,
It’s just that……..my tenacious hope never dies.

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