Magnets – by Abhilasha Kumar

Theme: Like a Moth to a Flame

12th March, 2010
Dear Diary,

I love the way he smiles. I love the way his eyebrows raise when he sees me. I love the way we text, I think it’s cryptic and utterly cute. I love the way his texts send my heart into a flutter. I love the way he swears. I love the way he forgets certain stuff. I love the way I know when he freaks out. I love freaking him out. I love the way his English is awesome. I love the way he pisses me off. I love the fact that I still want to talk to him; despite how much he irritates me. I love the way I wait for him to enter every classroom. I love the fact that he suggested me music. I love the fact that I ended up listening to music because of him. I love the fact that he dances. I love the fact that he knows when he should stop pissing me off. I love the way he apologizes, it takes my breath away. I love the fact that his thoughts are always on my mind. I love the fact that he’s the reason I’m always smiling. I love the fact that he keeps me happy.

17th March, 2010
Dear Diary,
I love the fact that he cooks, something I ALWAYS imagined would happen. I love the fact that he’s honest. I love the fact that he makes the rules between us. I love the fact that he’s elder to me. I love the fact that he loves eating out. I love the fact that he’s the wittiest guy I’ve come across. I love the fact that his texts make me laugh like nothing else is capable of. I love the fact that he reads everything I write, whether I tell him to or not. I love the fact that he doesn’t appreciate me, just for the heck of it. I love the fact that he remembers things about me. I love the fact that he is the kind of guy I had always imagined, would be my Mr. Perfect. I love the fact that he reads. I love the fact that he’s intelligent, and knows the world around him. I love the way he laughs when I swear at him. I love the way he fills in for all my ignorance, by knowing about every damn thing in the world. I love the way he says my name, in a hurry. I love the way he freaks out, when he sees me. I love the way he defines the red in my cheek. I love the way he’s making me wait. I love the challenge of winning him over.

25th March, 2010

Dear Diary,
I love the way he’s sarcastic, frustrated and still classy. I love the way he writes. I love the fact that he loves clicking photos, as I love being clicked. I love the fact that he’s the first and last thing on my mind every day. I love the way he’s got me all messed up. I love the fact that no matter how hard I try, I can’t kick him out of my system. I love the fact that he’s cute. I love the fact that he’s everything I ever thought HE would be. I love the way he says Sorry. I love telling him how much of a charmer he is. I love the way his charm works on me, like magic. I love the way he has his way with me. I love the impatience he instills in me. I love the way God sent him into my life. I love the fact that I’m ready to accept it, if he does not end up liking me. I love the way I’m so hopeful it’d be the other way. I love the fact that I think he’s the hottest guy. I love the fact that I don’t find anyone else cute anymore. I love the fact that he monopolizes my inbox, and my life.
I love the way he’s brought me to life. I love the fact that he’s killing me with every moment that we spend apart.

6th April, 2010
Dear Diary,
I love the way his presence makes me forget everything else. I love the way my heartbeat accelerates when he’s around. I love the way his eyes can freeze me wherever I am. I love the way we both can sense each other’s presence without even seeing each other. I love the way my heart explodes when we make eye contact. I love the way his voice lingers in my head. I love the way I can recognize his voice even from a million others. I love the way I remember every color of his shirt. I love the way he smiles when we’re talking. I love the way there’s something magnetic between us. I love the way the spark is wrecking havoc in my fist sized heart. I love the fact that how much ever I try to refrain, his thoughts won’t go away. I love the way I’ve come to define happiness as him. I love the way we’ve both realized that we’re impossible to keep apart. I love the way he exercises some sort of power over me. I love the way he’s tamed me, to his whims and fancies. I love the way we’re waiting – it’s making me madder than ever. I love the way every minute of my life is spent in his thoughts. I love the way it’s two sided. I love the way I can see the way I bewitch him, on his face. I love the way I’ve found Mr. Perfect.

14th April, 2010

Dear Diary,
I love the fact that we’re dangerous. I love the fact that it’s so intense. I love the fact that I’m in love with him, unconditionally. I love the way I can see the passion in his eyes. I love the fact that our togetherness scares us both. I love the fact that this is not just love – it’s madness. I love the fact that our proximity is unavoidable. I love the way people call us magnets. I love the way my head bends towards him. I love the way his hand wraps around mine, as if by default. I love the way his fingers are oddly shaped. I love the way we cannot remain apart for too long. I love the way his touch sends shivers down my spine. I love the way my friends think we’re obsessed with each other. I love calling him my obsession. I love being his obsession. I love the way my blood rushes through my veins, whenever I see him. I love the way he tells me I’ve messed him up. I love the way he says I’m evil. I love the way he says, anything. I love the way his perfume makes me feel. I love the way I feel he’s completely perfect. I love the way he tells me I’m too good to be true. I love the way I feel the same way. I love the way I’ve found meaning to my life, in him. I love the way it’s barely been a month, and we’re already inseparable. I love the way he’s given me something to die for.

25th April, 2010
Dear Diary,
Things are not the same. The magnetism – it’s dangerous. In a bad way.

4th May, 2010
Dear Diary,
Maybe everyone was right. Maybe we should’ve paid heed to their advice. Maybe we should’ve stayed apart. Maybe we were better off, controlling the attraction. At least it wouldn’t have come to this. This madness. I don’t want to write anymore. It hurts too much. My heart, I think it just died.

4th May, 2011
Dear Diary,
It’s been a year.
I still remember the colors of his shirt. I still look for him to enter class. I still think he’s perfect. My heart won’t ever flutter for anybody else, the way it did for him. My intuition won’t work for someone else. Being apart was too hard. But being together was worse.
But I cannot love all over again. It was him. It’s always been him, even before I actually met him. We were magnets, how can I ever forget that? He was my lobster. He was my Prince Charming. He was Mr. Perfect.
I know it’s silly,
And I know it’s not wise,
But I’m just stupidly invested,
To think otherwise.

10th May, 2011

Dear Diary,
Today
When I sat by the window
So much has been

I’m never writing diary entries again.
He’s gone.
I wonder if I’ll ever write again.

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